Mindset

Improving self-confidence with Ben Naumann

Self-confidence is one of those things that is required if you want to live a life of success.

It’s easy to fall victim to self-doubt when we hit failures from time to time, but we must not let that lower our belief in ourselves.

In this episode, Ben Naumann and I talk about how to improve your self-esteem and your belief in yourself. Many entrepreneurs have so much belief in themselves and their abilities that they say you can take everything from them and they will be able to rebuild.

The secret to self-confidence

So what’s the secret to self-confidence? One tip that Ben and I have is to keep the promises you make to yourself.

It can be easy to set a New Years resolution that we quit on after 2 weeks. It can be easy to decide to get in shape and then skip the gym frequently.

If we slip into the habit of letting ourselves down, we will believe that our promises to ourselves are empty, and that will make changing our lives much more difficult.

You need to be able to believe yourself when you commit to something

Start small

You don’t have to go all in right away. If you want to get in shape and haven’t been working out at all, setting a goal to work out an hour every single day is going to be tough.

Start small. Go to the gym twice a week for 30 minutes each. Then build up to 3 times a week, and so on.

As you start to trust yourself again and know that you can keep promises you make to yourself, you will see everything else in your life also start to improve.

Like the saying goes, a rising tide lifts all boats.


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Mindset

Stop playing small

Today’s post is inspiration to stop playing small. We are all guilty of this at times (myself included).

It’s cool to see that a lot of my podcast listeners look up to me like I’m some sort of celebrity or like I’ve already figured things out. But let me assure you that I’m only human… I also face moments in my life where I doubt my abilities and wonder if I have what it takes to achieve greatness.

There’s a quote I’ve heard that says “another level, another devil.” We constantly have challenges and as we become more successful, the problems we face just become larger.

Check out the video

Are you playing small?

Do you talk yourself out of thinking or doing more? If you find yourself thinking “I’ve never done that,” or “I’m not sure if I’m ready,” you are setting yourself up for failure.

It’s the little voice of self-doubt that makes us want to play it safe, to sit back, to stay comfortable. It’s that little voice that says “just keep your job, it’s safe, it’s what you know.”

However, that little voice, if we let it, can cripple us and destroy our dream before they truly have a chance to materialize.

Success leaves clues

Success leaves clues, and you don’t have to reinvent the wheel. Others who have come before us have achieved the levels of success that we sometimes think we are not capable of achieving.

But that should be enough to inspire us. If anybody ever accomplished something, you can, too. Be sure to surround yourself with mentors who are doing the things you want to do.

See how you can add value to them so that they take you under their wing and are more willing to go out of their way to mold you into success.

Achieve the impossible

On May 6, 1954, something incredible happened. You may have heard of Roger Bannister. If not, prepare to be amazed.

Prior to this date, it was thought to be impossible for a human to run a mile in less than 4 minutes. People thought that your heart would literally explode.

So, for decades, the feat was never accomplished. On May 6, 1954, Roger Bannister broke a 4 minute mile, achieving what was thought of previously as impossible.

Associated Press

The crazy thing is that after he did that, several others started to accomplish that same feat shortly after.

Once others knew it was possible, they started to achieve the same feat!

The point I’m trying to make here is to look to others who inspire you. Realize that many goals you think are “out there” for you were also seemingly impossible to others who have achieved them.

You, too, can achieve the impossible. It all starts by understanding that things you consider “impossible” are actually possible and have been achieved before.

Daily Motivation

“Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without thinking about.” – Winston Churchill

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Mindset

Be grateful for everything

Today’s post is about gratitude. It’s important to be grateful for literally everything. Even the bad days. Even the failures. Everything.

Why? Because chances are we have much more than we realize. Sure, we could always have more. But we could also always have less.

I just watched The Lion King with my girlfriend on the way home from a friend’s wedding in Dallas yesterday. It’s the same story as the original, so if you haven’t seen it yet I don’t feel too bad about “spoiling” things for you.

Check out the video

*Spolier alert* – Mufasa dies. It’s still sad in the new movie even though I saw it coming.

What does that have to do with anything? Well, it shows life is fragile and temporary. We need to show everyone love and appreciation.

But the Circle of Life provides hope that we can kind of exist in another form, like how Mufasa is still up in the clouds and living within Simba.

After all, we learn in physics that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transferred. I still remember that even though I got a C in that class in high school.

Proud but never satisfied

A cool phrase I’ve heard is to be proud but never satisfied. This doesn’t mean you should always be unhappy. Be happy with what you’ve accomplished and how far you’ve come. Just don’t let success allow you to settle for complacency. 

Appreciate what you have now

We take life for granted many times. We take loved ones for granted. Everyone around you will one day be dead. Not to be morbid, just trying to be real. 

Make sure you let people know you care about them, that they matter to you. And try not to get so caught up in chasing success and wealth that you ignore the simple joys of hanging out with people you genuinely like. 

Key Takeaways

Remember to be grateful for everything! 

Daily Motivation

“Remember who you are.” – Mufasa (The Lion King)

Actionable Steps

Tell someone you appreciate them today. 

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Mindset

One Life, No Regrets (Gary Vaynerchuck)

I want to share an extremely powerful video Gary Vaynerchuck published a few years ago with you.

As of today, it is his most viewed video. Within 3 years, it has amassed 4.8 million views.

Check out my video

Gary mentions that the biggest poison in us is regret. His vehicle for pushing hard is business, as that is his passion. He loves building businesses and competing.

Through that vehicle, he always pushes a lack of regret and how you should do everything possible.

If anybody ever did it, then you can too.” Stop complaining! Nobody is listening. The market doesn’t care about your complaints. It rewards value that people bring to the world.

Gary goes on to say that you have to make one person, and that person is YOU. It’s like when you hear the safety presentation on an airplane. They say if the oxygen masks on the plane fall down, you are supposed to put your own mask on first before you can help others.

If you aren’t happy, how will you be able to work to make others happy?

Gary admits that he’s just trying to figure it out, and has been doing it for years in front of his audience. Obviously, it’s working. They key here is to take massive action. We’re all figuring it out.

Just be sure to ask yourself if you are truly living a life of no regrets.

Key Takeaways

Remember that we only have one life. So why live one that you’ll regret? Take chances, take risks.

We are all trying to figure this thing called life out. Remember Gary’s motivating line that “if anybody ever did it, you can too.” That is 100% true and so freaking inspiring.

Daily Motivation

How you make your money is more important than how much you make.” -Gary Vaynerchuck

Actionable Steps

Do yourself a favor and just watch Gary’s video now, even if you’ve seen it before. It’s so well done.

The message really hits home and gets a fire under your butt to evaluate your life now and think about if it’s something you truly want. If not, it might be time to change something.

Watch Gary’s video here: 

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Mindset

You might be closer to success than you think

There’s a cartoon that shows two guys with pickaxes that are digging a tunnel to find diamonds. One of the guys has given up and has turned around, pickax thrown over his shoulder, and his head down.

He doesn’t realize that he is inches from breaking through, but we, the viewers, can see that he’s so close.

That’s how seeking success can be for us at times. We feel like we’ve put in enough time and effort and that we should be further than we are now. But what we might not know is that the breakthrough is about to arrive.

Check out the video


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I’m currently reading The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson. Jeff mentions how it’s the small, seemingly insignificant things that start to compound and build momentum in our lives. Sometimes, things we’ve done to get to where we are now can seem so unimportant and easy to do that we end up NOT doing them.

Just like how doing things right over time can start to build success, doing the wrong things or failing to stay consistent can cause us to backslide.

When we “skip a workout” or “have a cheat meal” more and more often, those little things start to build up. Then a year later, we wonder what the heck happened to our abs.

Travel back in time

A fun exercise is to look at memories either in your Instagram archive or Facebook memories to see how far you’ve come and how much you’ve accomplished.

I see memories from a few years ago showing me doing things I cringe at now, like playing 4 hours of Xbox or being so drunk I didn’t remember the end of the night before.

I have come so incredibly far. I’ve gotten into real estate, I just passed my Texas real estate license exam, I’ve filed a patent, etc. I’ve stopped drinking almost entirely. I’ve started to wake up earlier. I like what I see!

Do you like the growth you see?

I’m hoping that you love the growth that you see. Now, if you look at your history and archive and notice that you are kind of stuck in the same place you were a few years ago, it might be time to set some goals and level up.

Key Takeaways

Sometimes, we feel like we’re doing all this work and that we’re just stuck in place with wheels spinning.

But realize the power of the slight edge. Like the continuous force water has to cut through rock and eventually become something like the Grand Canyon, the little things we do every day matter, and they matter a lot.

To borrow a few lines from the book:

What you do today matters.
What you do
every day matters.

Daily Motivation

“We always overestimate the change that will occur in the next two years and underestimate the change that will occur in the next ten. Don’t let yourself be lulled into inaction.” – Bill Gates

Actionable steps

Try the exercise I mentioned of looking back a year, or 5 years, or more if you can. Social media platforms make it easy to look back on memories, which is always neat.

Hopefully, you’ve come really far! If you’ve come a long way in the last few years, let that motivate you to set bigger, better goals and continue the momentum.

If you’re kind of in the same spot… it’s time to level up.

Maybe you need to get some new friends, reach up to people in places you want to be in. You might have to leave the party-goer friends behind, or minimize time spent with them.

Take massive action as always. And remember that you are closer to success than you think.

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Mindset

Exploring self-awareness and individuality with Farhid Azari

Today’s episode features an interview with my friend, Farhid Azari. He is up to several entrepreneurial ventures, including Poseidon Pressure Washing (where he does residential and commercial) as well as a new venture called DealStryker.

Check out the video

Listen to the podcast

In this episode, Farhid talks about:

  • Self awareness and understanding individuality
  • You have to understand your thinking process
  • How Farhid isn’t the greatest at any one thing, but how he is great at problem solving and critical thinking
  • Writing down ideas to problems and then testing them until you find the solution
  • How many people figure out what they need to do but fail to follow through
  • Marketing is a problem solving thing
  • Look at yourself from a third person perspective
  • How Farhid applied his own advice during some difficult times in his life

Key Takeaways

Practice self-awareness today by following Farhid’s tips. Remember that even when times are tough and you’re in a tough spot, there is always a way to dig yourself out of a hole.

The first step is recognizing that you are not where you want to be. Then you take action to write down what you need to do in order to get to where you want to go.

Daily Motivation

“Life happens FOR you, not TO you.” – Tony Robbins. One guy at the Arete Syndicate Live event last weekend kept saying this every time something annoying happened. It’s so true.

Here’s an example. The restaurant a group of us ate at was taking a really long time. Like, 30 minutes to get a table, then 20 minutes before the server even came to our table to take our order.

One guy in our group jokingly said “it’s okay, this is happening FOR us, not TO us.” We were all hungry, but this helped us laugh it off and really not make a big deal out of it.

When times get tough, they are happening for us to learn something. We will grow when we overcome these types of challenges.

Actionable Steps

Practice writing down some problems or challenges in your life right now. Or even some things that just aren’t quite as great as you’d like.

Write down steps or action you need to take to move forward.

Follow Farhid on Instagram:
@faruhito

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Mindset

You only live once

One of my biggest fears is looking back at my life when I’m at the end and having a feeling of regret:

  • Regret of not trying everything possible
  • Regret of not giving my all
  • Regret of not having visited certain countries or having certain experiences

YOLO, you only live once. While this phrase is thrown around a lot in rap songs and pretty overused, I really do love it.

Watch the video

Why? Because it’s literally true. You really do only live once. You have only ONE shot at this life.

So often, we get caught up in worrying about what others think and how we’ll look if we try something and fail. It’s so easy to be afraid of trying new things or stepping outside of our comfort zone.

But… when we step back and take a look at the fact that tomorrow is not promised, what is there really to be afraid of?

Why not take a risk? Why not try something new?

Why not tell your crush how you feel?

Why not try that new business idea out?

What’s the worst that can happen?

That is something that you should ask yourself all the time. You’ll be surprised to find that the answer typically isn’t as scary as you may initially expect.

You want to start a business. What’s the worst that can happen? You raise money from investors, the business fails, investors lose money, and you might take a loss. Sucks, but it happens quite often.

You learn from your mistakes, you try again, and you do better next time.

As you listen to more and more content and podcasts about successful CEOs of popular companies, you realize that there were tons of failures along the way.

Many CEOs have a graveyard of ideas that didn’t work out for one reason or another.

Don’t let the fear of failure stop you from taking action.

On the other side of the coin, you can also ask yourself: what’s the best that can happen?

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What’s the best that can happen?

Let’s use the same example. You start a business. You raise money from investors. You do so well that you grow quickly and hire a successful team.

You go public and get acquired, have a great exit and become financially set for the rest of your life. The investors get a huge return on their investment.

To be fair, it’s not usually going to be black and white. It’s not like you either feel miserably or succeed flawlessly.

Usually, we tend to end up somewhere between the extremes and work to improve incrementally as time goes on.

We’re not perfect, but we are capable of more than we often give ourselves credit for.

I can think of countless things I’ve tried or done that turned out to be easier than I expected.

For example, some of you may be deathly afraid of public speaking. I’ve had the opportunity to speak in front of people a lot lately, especially in real estate.

I sponsor lunch at several offices around town and tell real estate agents the types of deals I’m looking for. I’ve spoken in front of as many as 60-70 people here in the last few weeks.

I jumped in front of the crowd at a recent real estate meetup to talk about a deal I had as I was looking for buyers.

You’ll find that the more you do something, the less frightening it becomes. You know what to expect, you have your pitch rehearsed.

What’s the worst that can happen, right?

In the meetup example, the worst that could happen was that there might not be anybody who wanted the deal I was pitching.

How about the best case scenario? I would find a buyer and make my profit margin.

To be completely honest, it didn’t end up how I wanted. I did meet some buyers who wanted other deals, but nobody really wanted the one I was pitching. Oh well. Like the Wayne Gretzky quote goes, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.

So that’s my message for today… what is there to be afraid of? Dominate your day. Face your fears and overcome them.

The only fear you should have is the fear of regret

Many people experience massive regret on their deathbeds. I’ve talked to older people who envy many of the things I’ve done: skydiving, scuba diving in Thailand, hiking in California, etc. They say “I’m too old to do that now.”

That is so terribly sad to hear… I can honestly say that if I die tomorrow, I would go knowing that I literally lived my life to the fullest possible extent.

I hope that’s not the case, because there’s still so much I want to accomplish, see, and do, but you get the point.

Let this inspire you to take action today. There will always be fear – do it anyway.

Don’t let fear stop you from taking action.

Facing fear is much better than looking back at your deathbed and having a list of regrets. Take action today. Dream big. Do big.

Face your fears today

Think about a few things you’ve been wanting to do for awhile but haven’t due to fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of what others think.

Create that Facebook page, or YouTube channel, or blog. Start putting out content. Stay consistent.

Others may laugh or make rude comments about your little traction at first… let them. Keep your head down, let that negative energy fuel you and make you want to succeed EVEN MORE.

Luckily, I’ve never really dealt with “haters.” At least nobody has talked bad about me to my face…. But even if they did when I started my podcast, now the laughing has likely stopped… people now ask how I grew the podcast to 19K+ monthly downloads.

The answer is surprisingly simple… I stayed consistent. I kept going despite all odds. And that’s how I did it. No paid marketing, no social media influencer connections, none of that. Just good, ‘ol fashioned discipline and consistency.

The same can be done with anything else. Pick your craft and then commit to doing the work. The only fear I will allow you to have is the fear of regret. Be very afraid of living a mediocre life. You are capable of far more!

Go get it.

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. – Mae West

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Mindset

How to be happy

What’s the secret to finding happiness? Are you happy? Not just right now, but like, truly content with life and where you are now?

Happiness is tough. We are emotional beings. There are ups and downs. But we all know people who seem to be happier more often than not. Alternatively, we also know those who complain about everything, no matter how much they have to be grateful for.

There’s this cool challenge I heard of when listening to a Ted Talk video called “365 give,” where the challenge is to give back in some way every single day. It can be something small like buying a meal for a homeless person or donating clothes.

There is something called the Helper’s High. Endorphins are released when we help others. So we can literally become happier by helping others. Cool, right?

Another way to find happiness is to start your day with gratitude… think of all the things no matter how small that you are grateful for. It’s hard to be in a bad mood after you realize how much you truly have. One mentor I follow on social media said to even be grateful for the things we take for granted most, like our hands, feet, and so on.

There’s a quote I love from Winston Churchill: “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”

Keep that in mind as you go about your day.

Check out the video for more on this topic as well as the podcast episode.

Have a happy day!

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.

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Mindset

Learn to Say “NO” and Focus On What Really Matters

We live in a busy world

There’s always a million things going on and the to-do list seems to grow longer by the second. With so many “urgent” and “important” things to do, it can be very difficult to say the word “no.” Maybe it’s a family member who wants you to drop him to the airport in rush hour traffic. Or perhaps it’s a boss who always tells you she needs something ASAP at 4:59pm on Friday as you’re about to drive out of town.

We tend to be people-pleasers. We often find it hard to say no to requests and find ourselves spending time or money on things we should have passed on. This is why I want to teach you how to say no.

Don’t be a “yes-man”

What is a yes-man? A yes-man (I guess you could also say yes-woman, to be fair) according to Merriam-Webster, is a person who agrees with everything that is said; especially : one who endorses or supports without criticism every opinion or proposal of an associate or superior. You might think that taking care of everything your boss wants done will make him or her happy, but being the go-to for every request will only make your situation worse.

When you say yes to every request thrown your way, you begin to take on too much. You start to waste time on things that really aren’t urgent OR important. One of the biggest kickers is that you might rush to finish a request and send it on to the next person. Then that person might sit on that information for several days before doing anything with it. In that scenario, you end up wasting all this time scrambling to do work just to have nothing happen. Can you think of a time or two that this happened? Are you a little annoyed remembering all the time you wasted? I’ve been there, too.

How to say no

When someone approaches you with an unreasonable request or even tries to sell you something you don’t really want or need, you need to be strong in your response. Don’t reply with “I can’t” or “I’m not sure.” Have a firm response like “I’m not interested in that product” or “I’m not able to help you with that.” This may be awkward at first, but I promise it gets easier and that it is extremely empowering.

When you say no to something that is going to waste your time or money, you are in the driver’s seat. You have full control of the situation. The people who are spending hours on things that are not adding value or have a bunch of junk in their garage that they were sold were unable to say no. They perhaps started with “I’m not sure” or “maybe later.” Then they were sold. They were pressured until they caved and said “sure, I can take care of that for you” or “okay, I’ll go ahead and buy that random mall kiosk toy that I’ll never use.”

When you cave in and take on something you know you don’t need or want, you’re stuck. It’s much harder to back out of something once you committed. But don’t be afraid to back out if you realize you need to. Tell someone you underestimated how long a task would take or that you’re really not able to take time away from your other priorities. Stress the limited time you have and that you can’t afford to let your priorities suffer by allowing distractions into your life.

So go out today and practice saying “no.” Get past the initial awkward feeling and you’ll be so happy you did. Your productivity will skyrocket when you stay focused on the things that really matter.

 

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